One of the wonderful memories I have of Thanksgiving as a
young kid growing up in Dayton, Ohio is when my Dad sent me and my two friends
Eddie and "The Jer", downtown to buy a live turkey.
It was kind of a passed down tradition I guess... My two
older brothers, Dave and Ricky, always got the dreaded chore of picking out the
live turkey...and they seemed to hate it....but when it came my time..I couldn't
wait.....I looked forward to the day when I would have a chance to ride the bus
downtown, go to the Arcade and look at all of the plump birds and decide
which one would feed our family on Thanksgiving.
The year was 1958 and I had just turned ten years old. It
wasn't any big deal back then riding the bus from my house into downtown Dayton.
The neat part was it stopped right in front of my house and sometimes the driver
would sit there for a few minutes to either take a smoke break or adjust his
schedule if he was runnin' ahead of time.
I called Eddie and "The Jer" and told them, "Today is the
day...we're going turkey huntin".
About 10 minutes later, I heard the familiar sound outside
my window of what sounded like a hoot owl......it was
"The Jers" way of signalin' me that he was outside and waitin' on me....We both would do it at each other's houses...3 loud Hoo Hoo Hoos...followed by another
phrase...."Oh Skeeter" or "Oh Jerry"..dependin' on who was callin'
who.
"The Jer" never really liked comin' in my
house....although he was always welcomed....my brothers would kinda stare at him
and wonder why he was so odd....Ricky would do the fake punch-like thing and
make "The Jer" flinch and then laugh at him.
We went outside and just then Eddie showed up on his
Schwinn bike that had been put together with spare parts...Eddie was limpin' a
little when he got off the bike from a slight injury he had the previous day
when he got his pant leg caught in the bicycle chain and it flipped him over the
handlebars and he scraped his leg.
We were in luck and didn't have to wait long for the
bus......a lot of people from the neighborhood would walk to our house and stand
there and wait on the bus...in the summertime, it was a great place to sell Kool
Aid for ten cents....but a lot of the little girls in the neighborhood,
particularly a little Asian girl from two blocks away, were forbidden to walk
near "The Kender Boy's House"....in case one of us was out there throwin' water
balloons or in some cases...shootin' a moon....but for the most part it was a
safe neighborhood.
We climbed on what we referred to the electric bus as the
"yellow banana" and proceeded to walk to the rear...Back then, we never had a
problem about going to the rear of the bus...heck, it was where you could do
stuff and not get caught. "The Jer" started to look around for any loose change
and Eddie stared out the window lookin' for that little Asian
girl.
Around Helena Street, a couple of greasers got on board
and walked back our way....one of them, with his duck tail haircut all slicked
down, gave us one of the fake punch things and made us jump...and he laughed
with his yellow teeth showin and then did it two more times. His buddy proceeded
to carve his initials with his switchblade in the back of the bus seat metal brace and we kinda kept
our heads down and didn't watch..but I saw "The Jer" lookin and I could tell he
was wantin' to do the same thing.
We got off the bus, just before we got downtown...and
right before the bus crossed the Little Miami River. This river was one of
several in the Dayton area that some how, some way, found it's waters eventually
pouring into the great Ohio River...we always dreamed about takin a raft down
the Little Miami but that day the only thing on our mind was gettin' that
turkey.
After we got off the bus, we walked to the bridge...it was
kind of a routine we had always done....we got off the bus...crossed halfway
over the bridge and stood there and spit for about 10 minutes. "The Jer" was
real good at spittin' and he also could let his spit hang down for almost a foot
and then let it go....sometimes he would even suck it back into his mouth and we
would all just about gag watchin' him.
We crossed the river and headed down Main Street...It was
Saturday morning and as usual Jack Wymer from WING, a local radio station, was
doin his Saturday morning, "Man on the Street Show".....we stood there and
watched and made some loud bird noises in hopes that we could disrupt the
show...."The Jer" even tried to make fart sounds with his hand in his armpit
and see if the microphone could pick up the sound....the assistant ran us off
after a few minutes.
A few blocks later, we got to the Arcade....the giant tall
glass doors reflected our images as we walked in and we all made faces at
ourselves.....The Arcade was host for a number of businesses including the best
soft pretzels in the world....Also, it was the first place I ever had a hot
pastrami on an onion roll which today still is my favorite sandwich. We looked all
around , eatin' free samples and would stop to watch as the butcher
would chop off the heads of big glassy eyed fish with one whack of his
cleaver.
We headed over to the live turkey and chicken area. The
place kinda had the birds outside because the poop smell was so horrible...you
would look around at which bird you wanted being careful not to let one peck at
you or get his spurs in you. Out of the corner of my eye I saw a big ole Tom and
I thought.."Yep, that's the one".
The shopkeeper grabbed him by his neck and said..."Do you
want me to dress him here?".....Well, "The Jer" he just started laughin and
almost spittin his one fake false tooth out and me and Eddie stared in
bewilderment not knowin what in the heck the guy meant....I mean was he gonna
put clothes on this turkey? ...He just stared at us and said "$2.00" and began
helping the next customer.
I grabbed the turkey by the legs and stuffed him in a
gunny sack that I had thought to bring with me. I had never gone with my brothers, but at least I knew I had to carry him somehow. He was a floppin all around and
makin' kind of a racket and "The Jer" banged the sack on the cement floor and he
kinda quieted down.
After payin' for the turkey, our bus fare (10 cents each)
down, and allowing for 30 cents to get back home....I had enough money to buy a
bag of popcorn that we all shared and a coke with 3 straws.
We went out of the Arcade and got on the east side of Main
Street and waited for the next bus that said "Redwood" in the sign on top. The
ole Tom started flappin again when we got on the bus and the driver gave us a
eagle-eye glare and asked what was in the bag......"The Jer", who was always
quick on his feet with a good lie, said...."Oh, it's my accordion, I think I
forgot to turn it off".....we headed to the back of the bus and on our way home
with "The Jer" lookin for more loose change and Eddie and I starin out the
window and wonderin' if the gum underneath the seat had been any of ours from
the trip down......not that we would eat it or nuthin'.
After we got home...Eddie got on his bike, but first
strappin' his pants to his leg and dreadin' the pump up Wampler Drive, one of
the steepest hills in the world....."The Jer" came inside and we used the
bathroom together tryin to cross our pee streams and at the same time tryin' to
sink my Dad's cigarette butts that he had flipped in there. "The Jer headed home
after Ricky gave him a fake-punch and made him flinch again and I went in and
watched television on our little yellow screen Zenith.
A little while later Dad hollered..."Tommy, where's that
turkey I sent you to get?".......I had left it outside cuz it was startin' to
smell read bad from all of the turkey poop it was makin.
I hollered back "He's in the garage"......Dad came in and
said..."Why in the world didn't you put him in the
refrigerator?..."
I laughed and said "He woulda pecked me to
pieces"
Dad said, "Is he alive?"
I said, "Well, he was last time I checked"
Dad shook his head and said something about him needin to
go to confession for the cuss words he was thinkin'
Mom came in and tried to console me and said..."Tommy, I
think when your Dad sent you for the live turkey, he wanted you to get it
dressed afterwards"..."Didn't the butcher ask you that?"........I looked
bewildered again and she just smiled......that was Mom.
I looked at her and said......."Dang it Mom...how come
growin' up is so hard."
Happy Thanksgiving, everyone.
